For those of us who are married, we all know that marriage isn’t easy. A lot of the times, you find yourself disagreeing with your spouse over the smallest things. You may often find yourselves fighting over things that are unrelated and irrelevant to the actual problem or issue you’re having. This is where communication comes in. I honestly believe that communication is one of the most vital parts of marriage. If you don’t have good communication between you two, all roads will ultimately lead to arguments and/or the unneeded fights.
A good marriage is one which allows for a great communication to exist.
For some, communication may not be an option in resolving or preventing arguments/fights. But it needs to be. A good marriage is one which allows for a great communication to exist.
It is OK to be brutally honest with one another. In fact, by doing that, you may be avoiding lots of problems. Honesty helps your better half understand how you truly feel; in return (hopefully), they’ll be able to treat you better and avoid what ignites your fire. It’s really important to understand that communication is key. A wife and husband who do not have good communication can not enjoy a blissful marriage. It is that simple.
Right before I got married, my mother sat me down. No one in this world knows me better than her so she started the conversation by reminding me of that exact fact. She said she wanted the best for me in this world and that included having a very successful marriage. She was very straight forward about what was expected of me as a wife, a daughter in-law and most importantly as the daughter she raised. She told me something that I still keep close to my heart forever. She said that you have to understand the way you behave so that you can be better prepared in dealing with someone else. And that is exactly what I did. To be honest, I was never good at communication. I use to get mad easily about the smallest things. My mom knew this about me and that’s why she gave me that wonderful advice.
Honesty helps your better half understand how you truly feel.
So work on your communication. Here are a few tips:
- Grab your phone and start writing freely about what it is that you are feeling. Keep a journal and write down issues you’d like to discuss with your better half.
- Understand your feelings. This is really important. Make sure you can express what you are feeling and articulate it in a way for your partner to understand them as well.
- Make time for one another to just talk. Maybe this is during dinner (for those of you who don’t have kids) or after you put your kids down for bed.
- Change “me” to “we”. Y’all are a team now.
- Be considerate and thoughtful. Do whatever it is that you would want them to do for you. Perhaps that will eventually give you the response you want.
- Be consistent in changing your habits. Don’t give up easily.
- Compromise. Compromise & compromise.
It’ll take a lot of practice and patience to improve your communication skills in your marriage. Try to change your habits bit by bit and you’ll be amazed at how the energy between you and your spouse changes. Those few modifications will make you understand that communication is a progress, but more importantly it is the KEY to having a harmonious marriage.
Till next time!
XOXO,
Sahra
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